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I have felt this way hooking up in the past, which makes some sense because being alone with a stranger is probably inherently awkward, but even with my spouse, whom I love deeply, I can’t seem to feel relaxed. I have no trauma that might be the root of this feeling, and I am generally very comfortable with my spouse. After sex, I just want some space and air, which doesn’t seem like it should be too much to ask, but if I try to extricate myself, my spouse gets upset. I have tried explaining that I need some peace and space in the very same way that they need snuggling and the like, to wind down and recenter myself, but I never seem to get through.

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Now, dirty talk is as an integral part of my sex life, and it’s almost become a type of kink or fetish I need to orgasm. Not only have I included it during foreplay and by sexting a partner some pretty graphic sexual scenarios before seeing them, but I also find myself talking dirty when I’m masturbating. Lisa talks about her fantasies of fucking other men while her husband fucks her tight pussy. She loves talking dirty while getting fucked and taking a hot load of cum all over her pussy.

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Social media embraces the ‘coconut tree’ meme

• This afternoon, though, we were going for round two, and we were getting into it and I wanted to slow things down a bit so I was teasing him and not letting him enter me.
• However, PDE5 inhibitors are vasodilators, not libido boosters.
• Erectile dysfunction can be caused by serious health conditions like diabetes and heart disease.
• So you should talk about that and ask him what he wants to do about this.

Before, Harris spoke how “everything is in context,” and about her mother used to give her a hard time, before saying the phrase. But what does the Harris’ “coconut tree” quote mean, and why has it become a meme? “You think you just fell out of a coconut tree? You exist in the context of all in which you live and what came before you.” I’ve been with my boyfriend “Todd” for five years. But we live in an apartment that’s really too small for the two of us and our pet rabbits Binky and Winky.

• I have tried explaining that I need some peace and space in the very same way that they need snuggling and the like, to wind down and recenter myself, but I never seem to get through.
• Once I was able to harness my ability to talk dirty in bed, I never looked back.
• You can click these links to clear your history or disable it.
• We had some of the most connected and amazing sex this morning that we have had since our youngest was born almost 10 months ago.

Understanding where his head is at will be crucial to your progress. If he doesn’t want to have sex in the first place, that’s a much more complicated issue, in many ways beyond what you’re capable of willing a resolution for. That he’s tried meds implies at least some degree of desire—whether he wants to have sex, wants to want to have sex, wants to please you, or something else is unclear from your letter. However, PDE5 inhibitors are vasodilators, not libido boosters. They work on his dick not his mind, so if his head isn’t in it, you’re not going to see much movement.

For him, whose second language was English, it was fun to play with the dirty words of my first language, words that I struggled to say because of my own issues and peculiar sensitivities to specific sounds. It was definitely a process with many baby steps, but I went from being able to say words like “pussy” and “cock” on their own to using them in complete sentence. This ability made me feel more confident in the bedroom.

This one goes out to all to the human-sex-mimicking bunny owners out there who haven’t found it within themselves to speak up. For a bigger-picture fix, I think you should accept your differing approaches to and needs for contact after sex as data. Is it such a big gulf between what you’re comfortable with and what you feel obligated to do that it may be worth pursuing other relationship options? It wouldn’t surprise me at all to find out that you decided to hang in there, perhaps with some minor alterations. This is driving you crazy, but how does your husband feel about it? Does he feel like his dick is betraying his sex drive?

People often have a hard time when the perception of their words doesn’t align with their intentions. It can be humbling in the most basic sense of the word to know that you did harm (or something close to it) by accident. For more information about how we process your personal data, please refer to our Privacy Notice. This menu’s updates are based on your activity.

If you invite him in explicitly, he may see that what happened was a blip, something you can both get over with minimal effort. My husband and I had a very rare work-free, kids-at-daycare day home together today. We had some of the most connected and amazing sex this morning that we have had since our youngest was born almost 10 months ago.

As important the touching and physical sensations are for my sex life, dirty talk has made my orgasms feel more complete. And now, I’m a better lover because I know how to communicate exactly what I want. In the months I dated Paul, he pulled from me bits and pieces and implanted thoughts that had never crossed my mind.